if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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