To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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