"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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