i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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