im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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