I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Randomize