Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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