Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
Randomize
