Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
