playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Edward fifth and chaser hands
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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