I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
