it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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