Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
Randomize
