Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
I was not drunk enough for that final.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
