we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
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