Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
