VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize