literally had 100 drinks last night.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
