I wannas sexs uuuuu
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Randomize
