can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
