Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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