I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Randomize
