I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
Heyyyy darlin are you busy?
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Randomize