I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize