They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
