This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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