There is no way he is gay with that hair.
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Randomize