im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
