That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
Randomize
