Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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