But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
I intend to get homeless drunk
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Randomize