Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
