I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
two words...techno handjob
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
Randomize