Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
Randomize
