hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
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