So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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