its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Randomize
