i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
Jesus knows you're telling a lie.
Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Randomize
