someone get that fucking seahorse.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize
