why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
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