Ambien. No doubt about it.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
I just found puke in my bra..
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
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