it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
