He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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