Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Can vaginas get frostbite?
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
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