handjob tips. give me some.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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