Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Randomize
