For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
So much Jack, so little girl.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
Randomize
