you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
