I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
