I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
my being single is dangerous.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
